Due to the nature of what's going on in my life right now I am sharing on this blog what I'm sharing on our church blog ...
One question you may be asking yourself is: Why? Why is Vince leaving? Why is he going to Las Vegas to start a new church on the Strip?
Well, there needs to be a church on the Strip, and I feel like I’m the right person to start it, but I’d be lying if I said that’s why I’m doing it. That’s what makes me feel better about what’s happening, but it’s not the reason.
The reason is one word: Obedience.
My wife and I have a saying with our kids: “Obey the first time.” (It’s sort of a Cartman, “You will respect my authoritae!” kind of thing.) Children are supposed to obey their parents, and we don’t believe in counting to three, or having to repeat ourselves, we expect our kids to obey the first time we tell them to do something.
I need to repent and ask your forgiveness because I did not obey God the first time. If you’ve heard the story (and if not, you can watch me tell it here, or read about it here) you know that God told to do this on Thanksgiving Day of last year. I did not obey. He told me again through my wife in January. I did not obey. He told me again through a friend in Israel in February. I did not obey. He told me again through a stranger who was filming me in March. I did not obey. All throughout that time I was seeking counsel from trusted friends both in and outside Forefront and everyone told me I should do this. I did not obey.
Finally I agreed to do what God was asking, but it took me awhile. I’m embarrassed of that, but thankful for God’s grace, that He puts up with disobedient children like me.
And it’s no excuse for not obeying, but you need to understand (and I think God understands) that this truly is the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to say yes to. I really don’t want to do this. I don’t want to leave Forefront. I don’t want to leave our staff and all my friends. I don’t want to leave Virginia Beach. I don’t want to move my kids. I don’t want them to have to be so far from their grandparents and cousins. I don’t want to live in Las Vegas. I don’t want to go through the pain of starting a church again.
In fact, if I could ask you to pray for me... Right now I feel like a kid whose parent said, “Clean your room” and the kid obeys the first time, but the whole time he’s grumbling and wishing he could be doing something else. And it’s cool that the kid obeyed, but as a parent you’d wish he had a better attitude. … Please pray for my attitude. I want to obey God not because I have to, but because I want to. And, to be honest, I’m just not there yet.
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6 comments:
We church planter types are stubborn aren't we? You are in my prayers, dude.
Vince,
I wouldn't be so hard on yourself. We really do not know the dialog that happened between Abram and his wife and his friends and family - do we?
We really do not know the dialog that happened between the same folks and even Abram with God when it came to sacrificing Isaac - do we? I am sure there was a bit of "no way" or "your kidding right" or "whatever God".
I am not trying to be blasphemous or anything, I just think we would be naive to think that Abram did not resist a little. I may be wrong, but.... maybe not?
Dude, the bottom line is you did obey - and the folks of Las Vegas are gonna reaps the rewards of your obedience!
p.s. You may want to brush up on your Spanish! Many of the casino workers are latino!
Vince, I love your honesty. I struggle now, not with "should I do this," but "why am I doing this?"
But, it's like you said: the answer is because God said so.
I know it's hard, but I'm excited that you are following God's leading to Vegas. And I'm excited to see what He'll do with you there.
Vince, please don't think you're out in left field with your present mindset. Struggling with trying to get your "mind and emotions" in line with your act of obedience is perfectly normal.
Without going into details, I'm struggling with the same thing. God told me to obey, I did, and I'm not happy about it. I desperately want back what He told me to give up. I can't help it. It's a normal human response and I've told God in so many words that he'll even have to change that part of my obedience. He'll have to change my "want to", for lack of a better phrase.
The words that He has been bringing to me over and over are, "It's a process. Let the process work." Part of obedience is immediate (Yes Lord. I will) And part is ongoing. (I will Lord, but you'll need to help me with a lot of this.)
Hang tough.
I'm very excited for you and your family and know that this faith stretching experience will only grow you all. Have you started a prayer support team yet? How do we sign on?
I can relate, and the awesome thing is that God truly shows grace when we resist obedience, and even when we are resistant as we obey. I've seen how God has changed my attitude as I obeyed, even when I didn't really want to. He can, and I believe He will, give you a heart that loves what He has called you to in Las Vegas. From following your ministry since I first heard you speak at the NACC in 2007 I am confident that God has gifted you to be a church planter, and that means planting new churches in His timing. I must admit that I've wondered when you were going to lead a new church plant:) May God bless you and your family as you obey and step out in faith!
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